Everything Counts in Large Amounts

It's been a tough transitional year

Today was the last day of the 2021-22 school year for kids. I still have a couple of staff days to work that entails mostly packing up and cleaning.  Getting back in the classroom was wonderful. I hated having all my students in masks but it was necessary and I'm glad we kept our masks on all year. If I ever got COVID, I never knew it. While I started the school year with all of my students on the same page (regarding masks), by the end of the school year,  a lot of students were pulling their masks down or not even wearing them. I tried not to be a nag too often but there were certain students, always boys, who consistently would not wear a mask. In one of my classes I had a group of boys who liked to rip masks off each other for fun, so I had to have plenty of masks on hand for that class. That afternoon class, depending on attendance, became quite difficult to manage which had me longing for the quiet "good ol' days" of being online. It did not happen often and only in that one class.

I went to a retirement party this evening and was thinking about the state I am in. There are a lot of teachers leaving the profession for various reasons, many retiring sooner than they had planned. Well, I had planned to retire this year. I actually had aspirations of retiring at 55 but decided to wait until 57 after my dad passed away. There are moments when I think, I can't do this anymore but there are so many more moments that I just can't imagine not doing this anymore. I have always loved my job but a lot has changed in the last few years and it's not just from the pandemic. In our district we've had crazy turn around (luckily not so much in my building) so there is a feeling like no one knows what they are doing at the administrative level. Our school is in the midst of a name change and construction remodeling which adds a very weird layer of chaos to the mix as well as a visual exposure to how everything is different.

In general behavior is different-- kids are slower, quieter, a lot more apprehensive. Every class goes at a slower pace then it did 3 years ago, before the pandemic. Phones have always been problematic but now they are so hazardous to learning I don't understand why they are still in the classroom. I have had students tremble in fear or start to cry at the prospect of my taking their phone from them.  Note; I actually never take phones away from kids. Typically students ignore my pleas to put their phone away and a few will sit through a whole class doing nothing (no matter how much a I nag) -- which is to say, they will stare at their phone the whole class period doing nothing productive. In my mind I hope they are doing some kind of research. One of my daughters assures me there is a lot to learn on TikTok.

Grades are lower across the board, even though grading in our district has changed significantly to make it much easier for students to pass classes. The lowest grade a student can get is a 50% and normally if a student is attending a class, doing any work, it is pretty difficult for them to fail my class. Having just finished my grades today, I see huge differences from pre-pandemic grades. Most students got A's in my classes with only a handful of students who would get D/F's mostly because of attendance issues. D/F's are still an issue primarily due to attendance BUT the majority of my students no longer get A's (except in Yearbook).  I had a girl tell me my class was too easy for her to be getting a B and asked how to get an A. I instructed her to go through the Google Classroom and do all of her missing assignments (which she had a handful of). Why do students not know to do that on their own? Assignments can no longer be marked down for being late, so more students should be getting A's, but they are not. It's as if most students just forgot how to do school after spending a year at home.

It isn't just students and administrators that have changed... teachers have changed. This past year I have been dismayed at the lack of what now is considered old school "drive." In general lots of seasoned teachers are just exhausted, especially those with young families but so many are also angry and a lot are refusing to do more than minimal work. Back when I was student teaching, I felt like a slave to my cooperating teacher because I needed a great recommendation to get a job BUT now there is a feeling that schools will hire anybody so there's no need to work so hard. I've always been one of those teachers who often stays late, comes in early and signs up for extra stuff just because I want to be a part of the team. Younger teachers are more often refusing to do the extra stuff -- especially if there's no pay in it. After all that extra experience you get from doing the free stuff just isn't as valuable as it used to be on a resume. But the REAL change is the anxiety levels for many teachers. It is off the charts-- between illness and school shootings, it's hard not to feel anxiety, even for someone as carefree as me. I heard one teacher had decided to bring a crowbar or axe to school with a towel so she could readily break her windows and escape her room if needed. Luckily I have a door to the outside in my room, but I too have spent a lot of mental time on knowing how to escape my room and what to do if our school is under attack. I'm also way more careful about propping my door open for students or fresh air (esp. after Uvalde). I know it's not like living in Ukraine but it still feels crazy.

Still, with all those changes, with all the stress of the pandemic, construction in my building, inept admin downtown, zombie students staring at their phones and not to even go into my aging body issue, I still love this profession. I'm committing to do this a little longer even though I was fully prepared (financially, not emotionally) to leave on Friday. In all honesty, all of my retirement funds have really taken quite a hit this past year, so a couple of extra years will only make things more comfortable later. I'm hoping those extra years will bring us back a new normal. I know it will never be the same as was before the pandemic in the classroom. These are clunky transition years and I'm flexible (and feeling young) enough to ride it out for a while... well, at least one more year, but I'm going to try to make it to 60.

 

Find Something Else To Do?

Our school is dealing with several threatening calls a day and on Wednesday, two small fires lit in bathrooms. One, I personally put out! Yes, I was walking to art from the main office, saw smoke and walked into the boys bathroom with another adult. I decided to turn the can over and smother the fire out, hoping the rubber can wasn't flammable. It seemed to work. While I was putting out the fire on one end of the building, another had been started closer to the art dept, also in a bathroom. Kids are weirding out and after getting to spend a day at the mall, they are trying different things to disrupt. At this point the police believe it may be the same person calling in all of the bomb threats but there copycats calling in weapon reports as well. We have stopped formally responding to them but there is a police presence at the school, just in case. Before the pandemic we had an "SRO" (school resource officer) at our school but the school board voted them out after George Floyd's murder. Without the SRO, there is now a bit of disconnect between our school and the police; students don't feel as safe, staff don't feel as safe, and a couple of kids feel free to start fires, call in weapon reports and/or bomb threats. There are rumors but no one knows who is calling in. Luckily we got the kid who started the fires. The police chief of the city did a news conference yesterday asking for those calling in the threats "to stop and just find something else to do." I'm hoping they were watching, I doubt it. It's been a crazy week-- uneasy at best. 

Lockdown vs. Lockout!

It's been almost two years since my last entry... a year of online learning and a semester of pandemic, masked in person learning and we are back to school lockouts, holds and bomb threats. Yesterday during 4th hour we got an all call to evacuate the school and go to the mall food court. My kids were in the photo lab, so they opened the garage and high tailed out. Since they were all seniors, most tried to leave in their cars. A few made it out with their cars but some were stopped and told to walk to the mall with the rest of us. Eventually about 80% of our students left the mall area for home or other places while we were waiting for K-9 units to search the school area. I would not call the situation stressful. It was almost fun-- definitely weird.

This morning during first hour we were told to "HOLD" which is just keeping kids in our class until things could be cleared up. There were rumors of a student with a weapon, other rumors of just another 911 call with a bogus bomb threat. I am still not clear what the issue was but a few of my kids were freaking out. One called her mom and asked to be picked up. I was not too concerned personally but there is something about the repetition of stress. I had just talked to my Monday morning students about my taking time off to see my daughter next week before she is sent to the Baltic Sea to be a presence. While the war in Ukraine is not directly affecting us, it is an added stress, especially the nuclear possibilities. One of my animators added a picture of Putin to his "the end" scene and instead of just writing the end, he wrote "the end is near." I thought it was funny, but it also told me the kids are thinking about it. So to get a bomb threat right after talking about war, it starts to add up. Then today!? After this morning's HOLD, the day seemed to back to normal but there was anxiety in the air.

I welcomed my 6th hour class today, not having talked to them yesterday and talked about all the happenings; and then LOCKOUT was called over the PA. I assumed that meant to go outside, so I sent my kids out. NO! It was the opposite. Oops. Luckily I am part of team. Grace and Josh rushed about and went into LOCKDOWN mode. We all hid in the computer lab while Josh implemented what felt like a fairly tense situation-- no talking and certainly no laughing. I pulled the safety protocols off the wall and started to read the difference between a lockout and a lockdown... basically it's about where the danger is. A lockout allows classes to go on as normal with danger being outside of the building. Lockdown means there danger INSIDE the building-- scary. Wanting clarification, I sent an email to a secretary asking if my kids could come out of lockdown mode and was given the okay. I read an official email from admin to my students and told them they could go back to my room (which is full of windows covered with shades), but assured them that if they wanted to stay in the computer lab (which is windowless) with Josh, they could. I had kids under tables on the floor fairly stressed out. A few decided to stay with Josh. He proceeded to teach. My students continued to ask questions about using the bathroom and leaving early since some did not have a 7th hour. The answer was no, no one could leave in a lockout. I got an email from a student who had been caught in the bathroom when the lockout was called and asked if he could come to class. I forwarded the email to the same secretary and was given a thumbs up. Yes, but make it fast. I emailed him that I would wait for him by the door. I saw him run down the hall and he was relieved to be in class in what felt like a fairly normal atmosphere.

Normal!? We were back to school, in masks but feeling like the pandemic was finally behind us. I've been exposed to countless students and have yet to get sick (at least I have not been aware of being sick if I ever did get COVID). Things were starting to feel normal. Madison lifted it's mask mandate just today! We'll be in masks at school until after spring break for sure but maybe by April, it will really be back to normal? But what is normal? Normal means back to lockdowns, lockouts and evacuations... I now know the difference.

Empty Classrooms

I finally have time on my hands!

This school year has been like no other. It started with a first semester filled with 2 new class preps, new extra meetings, and challenging students that included more freshmen than ever before. I felt overwhelmed at times but I survived, learned lots and ended up feeling like a better teacher but once the semester was over I got the flu in January. Second semester was a dream schedule and everything seemed to be headed in the right direction until the corona virus hit. Now everything is up in the air. 

After the governor announced no school after today, but then the county health department cancelled school on Sunday for three weeks. I've been told it will most likely be extended. I went into work yesterday and faced empty halls and empty classrooms but bumped into several teachers and administrators. The school district gave us 10 hours to come in, gather supplies, empty fridges, etc. I grabbed a couple of canvases, a large board to create a print, some ink and paper. I'm used to being able to always having access to the studio to get work done. I'm stuck at home with more time on my hands than I had planned for for Spring Break. 

 

It's been a while...

The semester ended up being almost overwhelming at times-- certainly more than I expected but I survived. I'm comfortably in second semester wondering what to do with this space, and how it's different from my personal blog. It was supposed to be my place to talk about school but I'm tied to keeping things somewhat vague. There is fear to share too much and I know not sharing much makes this place not very meaningful. I spent some time in other classrooms yesterday and observed behaviors I've seen in my own class and can't stand. Kids wearing headphones during class activities, kids getting up in the middle of activities to do things or leave early, etc. I guess it made me feel a little better to see it so rampant in the school and it wasn't just me but it bothered me. I do feel like we have a whole generation of kids who are growing up differently and then I wonder if every old teacher thinks that way? 

Clubs

Our first newspaper club met today at lunch. We had over 30 students, but that might have been because we handed out free Chick Fil A lunch. They donate food in exchange for an ad in our newspaper. I used to run the club but now the kids do everything, I just supervise and get paid to do so. It's the best way to do a club-- make sure the kids are doing all the work and I think they like it better that way. I supervise a lunch meeting every Monday and one late after school meeting a month where I get a ton of work done since the kids do everything for the newspaper. 

Since Geof retired, I'll be taking over the Animation Club after school on Wednesdays and I'm hoping not to have to do much for that one either.

Freshmen Only Day

For the first time as a high school teacher, I had full classes ready to start on Freshmen day, since I have two all freshmen classes. Still it was an easy day, without a full schedule and only 25 minute classes. Still my first hour was nerve racking as everything that could go wrong with technology did. I have a large screen TV, a data projector, a Promethean board and vision software that allows me to project my screen on student computers AND NOT A ONE was working. Lucking the computer tech bailed me out!

Picture Day 2019

We started the morning with a staff potluck in the cafeteria and did a community building activity that was lots of fun. We spent time looking at our school vision, goals, and actions for the year. We got our new JMM T-shirts which is pretty traditional here now. I don't know if other schools are as into t-shirts as ours but we get t-shirts for everything! We then broke up into principal departments (art is with music, PE and math which is a really good group) and we discussed race and equity more in depth. This is a conversation that seems to be pushed often in this district but it gets a bit deeper and more meaningful every time.  The conversation ended abruptly so that we could gather for an all staff photo in the gym which has also become a traditional now. After lunch we had our first department meeting with Joe as head. I felt bad because I had to run off to help get department photos done with the principal for the yearbook and staff board, so it made for a short meeting. The rest of our day was individual work time which was not nearly enough time to get too much done so I stayed late but I know all that needs to get done will get done because it always does! 

Welcome to the 2020 School Year!

We kicked off the 2019-20 school year with a pep rally. Almost 5,000 teachers and staff from the our school district’s 50 some odd schools gathered at the Alliant Energy Center today to start the school year with the three-hour rally that featured Madison School District admin, a student poet and Bettina Love, an author/speaker on issues of race and education. It was enlightening and motivating. I wasn't sure what we were getting into but the district did a great job planning a fun event. The worst part was the traffic in and out but how else do you get 5000 all in one place at one time?

Back at school after lunch we spent time with introductions-- we have a new art teacher on staff! We spent an hour in circle time reflecting and processing the pep rally and then the last 2 hours were for classroom prep individually. It is almost overwhelming because there is so much to do but I chipped away!

Loads of Summer PD

This is the first time I have been loaded up with lots of summer time professional development. It's interesting work and I'm glad to be a part a wonderful team doing the PD together. The first session, right after school got out was on project-based learning and how to plan a project. This was to train us for working with our Pathway team on creating an "Information Communication and Technology" (or ICT) project for next year. Then after a week off, we returned for another full week of training, learning more about the program and having time to actually plan the details of our project.

Not everyone involved in pathway teams were able to attend, as many teachers can not give up their summer time for various reasons; childcare being a big one. Some teachers don't need a reason, they just won't work over the summer. I had options offered for the time I worked; hourly pay, university credit that costs or district credit that is free, but one can't get paid for it. Credits are needed to advance on the salary schedule. Since I just advanced on that schedule this past year, I don't need credit anytime soon, so I just went for the hourly pay. Luckily for me most everyone on the ICT team attended at least for part of the time offering a lot of valuable time to connect and plan next year's curriculum. I think we are in for a very exciting experience.